Love & High school

If you know me, you should've known this was coming. Dating & high school is the topic of the day.

Quite honestly, I think everyone forgets what dating actually means. Especially us Christians. Dating is when we are ready to start looking for God's choice for us. When we are mature enough to start looking for our future wife or husband. I would encourage everyone to read "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" by Joshua Harris. Amazing book and a must-read.

Those who start dating when they are in 6th grade, honestly why? By the time you get to high school, you will have gone on several dates and you'll be thinking what next? Most often that is when couples get in trouble and move on to sex. And when you're in high school, specifically your freshman-junior year, don't use the use "I love you" or describe your boyfriend/girlfriend as "the one". They may actually be the one, but you're in high school for crying out loud!! Enjoy being a preteen/teenager hanging out with friends before you are thrust into the real world wishing that you were still a kid. 

The excuse "If you love me, you'll have sex with me" is so stupid. If that person actually loved you, they would respect your wishes to not and should actually themselves be thinking the same thing. But I know that there are times that you are overwhelmed or do feel strongly for the one you are dating. But I'm also telling you, saving yourself will just make it that more sweet for your future spose. You may end up with the one you are dating through high school, I'm not saying that relationships that start there fail. I'm just saying stay true to yourself and your beliefs. 

An example at a LifeLight event really put it in perspective for me so I'll share it with you. This guy went through his high school and college dating several women and having sex with all of them. Let's pretend this guy is a bed and every time he has sex with a woman that is not his wife, a bucket of mud gets thrown onto his bed. Then he meets his future wife and he falls in love with her. When he's talking to her about marriage and courtship (if you don't know what that word is look up, because you should), she tells him she is a virgin. She tells him that she followed what God wanted for her and was saving herself for her husband. Then he has to tell her that she would not be his first. That he had slept with several other women. And she cries knowing that she will not be his first. 

Besides, say you're "in love" and you decide to have sex outside of marriage. And you wind up pregnant. Abortions are the murder of innocent children, so don't even consider that option. As a high schooler, you could put your baby up for adoption and hope that the adopting parents will allow you to visit your child. Or you could try and raise your child yourself, or push your responsibility off on your parents. And because the whole deal is stressful on you and your boyfriend/girlfriend, you wind up breaking up or in an unhappy marriage because you were forced to put your dreams and aspirations on hold. Don't you go blaming anyone but yourself because that moment you decided to have sex, you felt you were "mature" enough to be able to do so. Well guess what? There's consequences to that. 

A little off topic - but it is very relevant. Here's another thing you should pay attention to. If your family is concerned about how close and "touchy-feely" you and your date are getting, perhaps you should listen to them.  Especially when you have only been dating for a handful of months, you shouldn't even be kissing. Plus you start behaving like a brat (I would say witch with a capital "B" but that wouldn't be very nice & an inappropriate word so we'll stick with brat) to your family, you're obviously doing something wrong. And the moment you disrespect your parents, maybe you should think about how you are behaving. Stop accusing them of being "unfair" and accusing everyone else of being immature. I'm thinking of several instances, some of my own personal experiences included, that I have heard, seen or experienced where if I would've spoken to my parents like that, I would've gotten my butt whipped and grounded for a minimum of 2 weeks. Without a phone. But you know what, I would've deserved it. Because God says honor your father and mother and clearly in that situation, it was anything but respecting them.

Being a little bit older now and being so close to being actually out in the world, please take it from me. You may not want to hear it, but I honestly know what I'm talking about. Mostly through personal experience and then from watching others do exactly what I did (or worse). Stop trying to live your life by becoming something else. Live a life that would be pleasing to God.